How To Be The Most Interesting Person In The Room

Photo via Rob Wilcox

Please don’t ever let this be the first question you ask anyone ever again…

So, what is it that YOUUUUUUU do?

I’m too ashamed to even lift my palm and smack you in the face right now my friend.

You’re a smart, intelligent, interesting human… QUIT DOING THIS.

Why?

One, the majority of people aren’t happy with the work they are doing. Don’t make their first encounter with you a moment of embarrassment where they have to talk about their 9-5 that sucks the soul out of their bod 40 hours a week. Ugh.

Two, this question is asked SO often that people typically have a rehearsed answer. Therefore, they go on auto-pilot and check out.

No wonder their eyes be all glazed over! They’ve answered this 8398238430348 times already.

Three, (and most importantly) it doesn’t help YOU help THEM.

Keep reading and I’ll teach you how to do that…

TLDR: Don’t kick off your conversations with beautiful strangers on topics they aren’t jazzed about that spin them into a scripted reply.

THIS IS NOT HOW YOU BECOME THE MOST INTERESTING PERSON IN THE ROOM.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR CONVERSATION WAYYYYYY SEXIER

Instead, I want you to banish that boring ass (and lazy way) of getting to know peeps from your vocab.

Cool? Cool.

Instead, slide this super simple but awesome, unconventional, and energy-inducing question into its place:

So, what are you most EXCITED about in your life right now?

Say hello to your new friend dropping back into your convo and ACTUALLY being engaged and excited about what they are chattin’ about.

Instead of hearing about their boring ass J-O-B, you’re likely to hear about:

• a cool project they are working on
• a stellar vacation they are amped about planning
• or a personal goal they are kicking some major ass on

BECOME A CONVERSATION SUPER HERO

This new conversation kick off style will make you a conversation super hero because your new friend is likely to feel one of the following:

• Gah, finally! Someone who didn’t immediately judge me by what I do for a living.
  NOTE: you may not do this but a lot of peeps (especially ones who don’t dig what they do) are afraid you will.
• You’re causing a pattern interrupt by taking a non-traditional route — a crucial step in being REMEMBERED.
• Their eyes light up and they tell you about something they actually care about. This is more telling about who they are and what they value, then how they earn their smackers.

WHY ASKING THE MOST BORING QUESTION ON PLANET EARTH CAN BE HELPFUL

Before you get all sassy because you want to ask people what they do…

I’d like acknowledge that asking people what they do for a living can be helpful.

It helps your brain create context on ideal conversation topics and possible interests.

I talk to an engineer differently than I do a professional DJ because I can imagine what topics may interest them.

If you want to be the most interesting person in the room… you CAN ask people what they do for a living, just don’t make that the FIRST question you ask them.

Make it the 15th 😉

Also, how fun is it to challenge YOURSELF in conversation to NOT know what they do for a living? Loosing that context is really uncomfortable.

Give it a try and see how out of the ordinary if feels for you.

Remember, interesting conversations begin with interesting questions. 

One final thing…

If you want an extra awesome way to connect with peeps and feel uber awesome in the process, follow up the first question with this second stellar one:

Awesome! What do you need to complete that goal?
Who are you looking to connect with?
What’s the biggest challenge you’re facing between you and the finish line?
AND — How can I can help?

Then, listen.

And truly consider how you may be able to help them.

Asking “how can I help you bring that to life?” has brought me some really cool experiences. Like the time I met a guy who had a REAL LIFE Mystery Machine from the Scooby Doo cartoon. See exhibit A.

When I asked how I could help, he told me about how he dresses up as the crew from Scooby Doo and goes into a local school for blind children to make their day.

Turns out he needed a Velma for his next trip…and uh, WE BASICALLY HAVE THE SAME HAIR CUT! 🙂

So there I was a week later:

Not only did this memory become one of my favorites from the year — I’ll never forget the pure excitement we were able to bring to the children. Queue the warm fuzzies.

This experience happened because I asked — how can I help you with what’s important to you right now?

You can get anything you want in life, but it’s going to be a whole lot easier (and more enjoyable) if you help other people a long the way get what they want too.

Stop using boring questions as a crutch.

It’s lazy.

PLUS, you miss an opportunity to spark a truly awesome conversations, be REMEMBERED and see how rewarding it feels to help other people with what’s important to them.

YOUR TURN…

Do you agree or disagree with this question? What are other interesting questions you ask new people you meet? How would YOU answer this question if I walked up to you right now and asked you?

Drop your comment below and let me know. I respond to all comments – feel free to ask any follow up questions you have as well.

Stay awesome and adventurous my friends,
Kendra “Keepin’ It Interesting” Wright.

Read the original article here.

How to Work Alone 4 skills needed when you work in solitude.

By Paul Jun Illustration by Atipus

Being in a space that’s free from distractions while managing your time and output sounds like freedom (and is the fantasy of nearly everyone in an “open office”). But working alone isn’t some magical cure-all. As soon as you get into the groove of working alone, you realize that you aren’t alone and the battle was never external; it’s internal.

Luckily, working remotely is a relatively new luxury. Working alone, however, is something that people of all trades and crafts have been doing for millennia.

Working alone is about creating the space where intense concentration becomes easily accessible. When finally alone, it’s easy to allow a wave of self-doubt and insecurities to begin to flood your mind. Sitting in solitude for even five minutes makes you get up to grab a snack. Or to check Twitter. And perhaps the most challenging of all, you don’t know when to call it a day; the constant polish and re-polishing when your energy is low masquerades as productivity — or so it goes if you’re not prepared.

If you begin to work alone with only the toolset you have from working in an office, you may run into some trouble. Thus, working alone requires mastering a few key skills:

Skill #1: Silencing the inner demons and going with the flow.

In his book The Inner Game of Tennis: The Classic Guide to the Mental Side of Peak Performance, W. Thomas Gallwey talks about the game of tennis, but really the book is about how to quiet the mind.

He believes that weak athletic performance and bad art all stems from the same seed: overthinking. He explains:

We have arrived at a key point: it is the constant “thinking” activity of Self 1, the ego-mind, which causes interference with the natural capabilities of Self 2. Harmony between the two selves exists when this mind is quiet and focused. Only then can peak performance be reached.

When a tennis player is “in the zone,” he is not thinking about how, when or even where to hit the ball. He’s not trying to hit the ball, and after the shot he doesn’t think about how badly or how well he made contact. The ball seems to get hit through a process which doesn’t require thought. There may be an awareness of the sight, sound and feel of the ball, and even of the tactical situation, but the player just seems to know without thinking what to do.

This concept is synonymous to flow, a term coined by the pioneering psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. He interviewed a multitude of artists and scientists in Creativity: The Psychology of Discovery and Invention, and discovered that there were nine elements that entranced a person into a state of flow. 

1. There are clear goals every step of the way. 2. There is immediate feedback to one’s actions. 3. There is a balance between challenges and skills. 4. Action and awareness are merged. 5. Distractions are excluded from consciousness. 6. There is no worry of failure. 7. Self-consciousness disappears. 8. The sense of time becomes distorted. 9. The activity becomes autotelic.

Even a firm understanding on this doesn’t stop those pesky demons from showing up. What sets you up for success — to get into a state of flow so you can quiet your mind and do the work.

Getting to this state is the goal of any creative work session. If you’ve worked in an office doing mostly reactive work, you may forget what this even feels like.

That is, your work must be challenging enough to keep you engaged but easy enough to prevent frustration. Additionally, an ability to allow this “deep work” to occur requires you to be vigilant about outside interruptions. Which brings us to…  

Skill #2: The ability to face distractions head on.

As Pablo Picasso said, “Without great solitude no serious work is possible.”

What is it about solitude that allows us to do our work? Why can’t it be “without great coffee” or “without great power-naps no serious work is possible”?

Being alone can often feel like being pushed in front of a big mirror that plays back our errors and experiences we may not be proud of. It’s hard to ignore our flaws, even when we know everybody has them. When we’re in a social setting, there’s an atmosphere of stimulus to distract us from thinking about ourselves; we’re curious about other people’s thoughts and how they’re viewing us. When we’re alone, we can’t help but tune in to the voices that readily get muted.

Solitude goes from a bully to a teammate; from something that makes you squirm to something that becomes the bedrock for intense concentration and creativity. There are no right answers and this is perhaps the most difficult habit to attain, but it’s worth it.

Try these practices to help you deflect distractions and to learn how to use solitude to your advantage. 

Listen to sounds of nature:

I’ve discovered that ambient sounds help me achieve this state of flow more quickly. It overpowers my self-defeating thoughts. According to Greg Ciotti, “Researchers have shown that a moderate noise level can get creative juices flowing, but the line is easily crossed; loud noises made it incredibly difficult to concentrate. Bellowing basses and screeching synths will do you more harm than good when engaging in deep work.”

Apps like Noisli are my secret sauce. Once I plug my headphones in and hear the sounds of rainfall, birds chirping, or a fireplace crackling, I can feel distractions fading. It calms the storm of thoughts in my mind and allows me to focus on the task at hand, and lessens the likelihood of a coworker or coffee barista jarring you out of your concentrative state.

Accept imperfection: 

A question worth asking is, “Does anyone swiftly move from start to finish like the wave of a brushstroke? Is there anyone that doesn’t face distractions?”

No. Then why ask the impossible? We have a fantasy of working in solitude for hours on end, uninterrupted and pure. But such a scenario is unlikely (and not even all that more conducive to productivity than your current one). Don’t chase an “ideal” work environment, accept what you have.

Once you let this reality simmer, it’s easier to get to work. Rather than fighting the notion that you have to work effortlessly in order to get work done, you can soon accept the reality that deflecting distractions is part of the creative process. The more you show up in this space of working alone, the easier solitude becomes.

Skill #3: The ability to know when the day is done.

The renowned author Haruki Murakami wakes up at 4:00 a.m. and works for five to six hours straight, according to Mason Currey in Daily Rituals. In the afternoon he runs or swims, does errands, reads, and listens to music. Bedtime is 9:00 p.m.

“I keep to this routine every day without variation,” he told The Paris Review in 2004. “The repetition itself becomes the important thing; it’s a form of mesmerism. I mesmerize myself to reach a deeper state of mind.” 

In the War of Art, Steven Pressfield describes his morning routine for facing, and overcoming, the Resistance. He rises early, eats his breakfast, and is in his office by 10:30 a.m. He plunges in and writes until he starts making typos — this is a cue that he’s getting tired and has been at it for about four hours.

He continues by saying:

“I’ve hit the point of diminishing returns. I wrap for the day. Copy whatever I’ve done to disk and stash the disk in the glove compartment of my truck in case there’s a fire and I have to run for it. I power down. It’s three, three-thirty. The office is closed. How many pages have I produced? I don’t care. Are they any good? I don’t even think about it. All that matters is I’ve put in my time and hit it with all I’ve got. All that counts is that, for this day, for this session, I have overcome Resistance.” 

The lesson is simple: When you’re clear about your boundaries, you know in your gut when the day’s work is done. A “normal” salaried job typically has defined hours. But as anyone who has experienced the 3 p.m. oh-my-god-I-need-coffee sensation, long hours do not always equal lots of output.

Take advantage of your solitude. Be very clear and deliberate about what you should, can’t, or wouldn’t do. Without boundaries while being alone, you will work into the night with dark circles under your eyes, falling under the seductive illusion that you’re being productive. You’re dogged, yes, but at what cost?

You have to determine when the day’s work is done so you can let the unconscious part of your mind do its work, too. Whether this is based on a time of day, a cue like making excessive typos or mouth-tearing yawns, you are the custodian of your output.

Skill #4: The ability to find your natural habitat.

I envy people who are able to work at coffee shops, especially people who don’t even use headphones to block out laughter and chatter. Their eyes are sharp like a snake and nothing outside of that 11-inch screen can seduce their attention. Like a polar bear switching with a grizzly bear, it’s a mismatch in preference and predisposition. It took me many failed attempts to learn that I will never be the type of writer to work out of that environment. I blame my parents, but I’ll be fine.

Some people feel this way about working from their room—right in front of the bed and down comforter and fluffy cold pillows. Which is why some carve out an office space in their home or build one in their backyard.

If an animal doesn’t return to their natural habitat, they’re in danger. Luckily for us it’s not that grim. We can learn through experimentation which environments are best suited for us at specific times of the day.

For example, if my intense creative labor is done in the mornings, I prefer my room. But the later half of the day — which is dedicated to reading, editing, and emails — can be done anywhere: the park, the library, or my friend’s kitchen counter while I’m standing. This works for me. Experiment to see what works for you. Again, half the fun of working alone is doing it on your terms. Don’t let any productivity blog tell you the “right” way to work.

Keeping a pulse on your natural habitat takes self-awareness—you need to keep tabs on your mood and productivity when you’re in different environments. Rather than being in that environment because it feels good, it also has to facilitate the flow of your work, too.

***

When you find solitude in your natural habitat so you can become mesmerized into a state of flow, when you accept distractions as part of the process and are clear about the day’s finish line, working alone becomes an enriching catalyst for creative labor.

What’s the most valuable piece of wisdom that you would tell a friend about overcoming the struggles of working alone?

Read the original article here.

The Neverending Quest for the "Next Amazing"

When I had an insight into how every single human being at their core is nothing but love, covered over by an incredibly powerful system of mind, thought, and consciousness that happens to make up all sorts of compelling stories about who we are, and what we need, and what is good or bad… I felt great compassion for everyone who hadn’t yet seen the truth of this for themselves, on both sides of the spectrum… from the homeless person using drugs to feel better…. to the celebrity or wall street banker or aspiring “great” coach using achievement/ fame/ money/ power/ adventure/ things to feel better.

And it’s all so completely understandable that everyone continues to get lured into this trap, since the illusion of the need for more is sooooooo pervasive in our modern culture, continuing to tell us what we need, and how and where to get it.

And all of this is so easily reinforced by the belief in our made-up insecure thinking, which we usually don’t even realize is insecure thinking.

And then there’s all the “good” feelings that get produced when we get the next “hit” of our addiction for more… the next amazing trip, the next amazing achievement, the next amazing purchase, the next amazing encounter, the next amazing conversation, the next amazing experience. Who wouldn’t want “amazing”, and who wouldn’t make the assumption that amazing only exists “out there” in what we have and what we do, until somehow we discover there’s something even more amazing “in here”.

But, we just don’t see it until we see it. And even those who have had some sort of glimpse of it, will still get fooled by the compelling nature of our very human insecure thinking, as it appears in all its elusive and ambiguous and hidden forms.

And so maybe that’s just life… each of us on our own journey, sometimes seeing through the fog of our thinking and often not. Sometimes peeling off the layers of our craziness, and sometimes just adding more. There’s no right or wrong in any of this. There’s just an experience. 

And maybe, if and when we each get a chance to see through the craziness of our thinking, and realize who we truly are at our core, there’s just a little bit less of the need for more, and there’s just a little bit less suffering, for ourselves and others.

In the past, I never really understood the depth in the statement of “blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth”. Now I understand it as the happenstance of somehow letting go of all we think we need, and in doing so, somehow discovering how we already have everything we need and so much more than we could ever have imagined.

Most days, I’m a ridiculously insecure human being with a lot of crazy made-up thinking, and so I keep forgetting the truth of who I am. But I also see that every other human being on this planet, is innocently doing just the same.

Read the original article here.

4 things you probably don’t know about insecurity…

…and 1 thing you know all too well!

By Lian Brook-Tyler

1. Firstly, you already know that feeling insecure absolutely sucks!

At best, it bitches away at you from the shadows…

“You’re not good enough to do that.”, They’re all looking at you and thinking you suck!”, ”

It holds you back from doing the things in life that you really want to do or stops you enjoying the things you are doing.

It messes up your relationships and stops you being your best at work.

At worst it spirals into anxiety, a crippling lack of self-worth and confidence, and life-sapping doubt and fear. Ugh.

You knew that right? So here’s a few things you might not know…

2. Feeling insecure is down to your thoughts in that moment because we feel what we think.

That sounds ridiculously simple, doesn’t it? Too simple to be right. But it is right. That’s the way our minds work: our thoughts create our feelings.

“You’re not insecure, Syd. You just think you are.”

These are the words spoken by a psychiatrist to theosopher Syd Banks and which sparked a life-changing shift from being… or rather thinking he was… a negative, insecure person.

So next time you feel insecure, stop for a moment and notice what you’re thinking, then notice that the feeling is simply being created by an insecure thought.

3. Insecure thoughts are not inherently true.

I know they look super-realistic 3d technicolor true. But they’re not.

Next time you feel insecure and notice the insecure thought creating the feeling… and ask yourself ‘Is this really and truly true?’

Some useful ways to look at this are:

“Is the only way it can be?”

“Do I sometimes think about this thing differently?”

“Might someone else think about this differently?”

“What’s the inverse of this thought?”

You’ll notice that there’s not just this one way to think about anything and you’ll also notice that all sort of other feelings that can be created by different thoughts.

You’ll almost always get some distance and perspective, and therefore fresh thoughts and new feelings will flow.

4. Whilst they’re designed to seem very real and important and there to protect you in some way, most insecure thoughts aren’t helping you at all.

Ultimately yes, insecure thoughts are there to alert you to danger and to keep you safe. And back in the day, when we were spending far more of our time facing all kinds of life-threatening situations, our thoughts of fear and insecurity would have been absolutely serving us, they would have been keeping us alive.

But now, when the average person isn’t faced with many true fight or flight situations,

I’d bet that all of your insecure thoughts are complete rubbish and they’re not helping you to stay alive. In fact often quite the opposite, they often stopping you from really living… Closing you up, shutting down your connection to the world around and making you stay focused on yourself.

Next time you notice that you have an insecure thought, maybe ask yourself:

“Is this thought serving me?”

“Is there really a tiger about to eat me? No? So, is this really a life and death situation then?”

“What would be possible if I wasn’t so busy focusing on these insecure thoughts?

5. We don’t need to work on ourselves to make ourselves feel secure.

Our natural state is secure, happy, calm, curious, creative and generally feeling cool (and it’s only insecure thoughts that make it appear otherwise).

When we stop focusing on our insecure thoughts, we can learn, connect and play. We can have incredible lives and doing amazing things… all very naturally.

Without those thoughts… how you would be? What would you do? Where would you go?

Read the original article here.

Struggling with Tasks That You Don’t Want To Do? Try These 7 Tips.

How many times each day do you try to work yourself up to tackle some undesirable task? If you’re like me – several times.

For instance, I’ve been refining my Four Tendencies Quiz. Almost 500,000 people have taken the quiz — which is extraordinary — and I’ve made adjustments to it, along the way, to make it better.

Analyzing the Quiz results takes a very different kind of brain work from the kind that I usually do — and it’s not the kind of brain work I like to do. And so I put off that work, and put it off, and put it off. And then when I finally do the work, I get through it quickly and am so relieved to have it done. So why procrastinate?

If you face a similar struggles, try these strategies:

1. Put yourself in jail.

If you’re working on something that’s going to take a long time, and you have the urge to try to rush, or to feel impatient, pretend you’re in jail. If you’re in jail, you have all the time in the world. You have no reason to hurry, no reason to cut corners or to try to do too many things at once. You can slow down, concentrate. You can take the time to get every single detail right.

2. Ask for help.

This is one of my most useful Secrets of Adulthood. Why is this so hard? I have no idea. But whenever I ask for help, I’m amazed at how much it…helps.

3. Remember: most decisions don’t require extensive research.

This is another important Secret of Adulthood. I often get paralyzed by my inability to make a decision, but by reminding myself that often, one choice just isn’t that much different from another choice, I can move on.

4. Take a baby step.

If you feel yourself dismayed at the prospect of the chain of awful tasks that you have to accomplish, just take one step today. Tomorrow, take the next step. The forward motion is encouraging, and before long, you’ll probably find yourself speeding toward completion.

5. Do it first.

The night before, vow to yourself to do the dreaded task. And the next day, at the first possible moment – as soon as you walk into work, or when the office opens, or whenever – just do it. Don’t allow yourself to reflect or procrastinate. This is particularly true of exercise. If you think you’ll be tempted to skip, try to work out in the morning.

6. Protect yourself from interruption.

How often have you finally steeled yourself to start some difficult project, only to be interrupted the minute you get going? This makes a hard task much harder. Carve out some time to work.

7. Ask yourself: Do you need to make a change?

Pay attention to the amount of time you spend working on tasks you dislike. No one enjoys invasive medical tests or preparing tax returns, but if you feel like your life consists of nothing but going from one dreaded chore to the next, you should take note. Maybe you need to think about switching jobs, or delegating a particular chore to someone else, or paying someone to take care of a task that’s making you miserable.

Speaking of the Four Tendencies, as an Upholder, I’m very good at making myself do things I don’t want to do, and while this is an enormous help in many situations, it has also allowed me to go down some dead ends in my career. The fact is, you’re unlikely to be happy or successful when every aspect of your life or job feels like a big drag. Don’t accuse yourself of being lazy or being a procrastinator, but ask – what’s making this so difficult? The fact that you’re finding it hard to make yourself do something is a sign that maybe you should be doing something else.

On the upside: novelty and challenge, as uncomfortable as they can be, do bring happiness. The chore that feels onerous today may give you a huge boost of satisfaction tomorrow, when it’s behind you. Keep that in mind.

Read the original article here.

The Secrets to Small Business Success (Infographic)

Click here for the original source.

10 Signs Telling You Should Let Go Of What You Have And Move On

The idea of letting go can seem terrifying. Strong emotional bonds and feelings can make it hard for us to move on – even when we know we are putting our happiness at stake.

However, it is important to embrace letting go and moving on. Holding on to old feelings and reliving past decisions can cause you to become stressed, upset and bitter. This can negatively affect your present and future, but you can make the conscious decision to let go so that you can live a peaceful and happy life.

Here are 12 moments that are telling you to let go and move on.

1. You’re Changing Into Someone You’re Not

Our personal values and goals and dreams define who we are as people. If you think that these things are changing for the worse, it may be that your job/partner/friend/family are trying to make you be someone you’re not. If this happens, it is time to move on – you will never be happy pretending to be someone else.

2. Your Dreams Are Getting Harder To Achieve

Your dream once seemed achievable, but now you think that it would be impossible to achieve them – or that it would be a waste of your time. If you feel this way, it means you need to take action by putting your dreams first again.

3. You’re Faking Happiness

If you feel like you have to fake a smile every day, it may be because you feel like you need to hide your true self. Let go of anything that makes you feel this way, as it clearly brings you down and lowers the quality of your life.

4. You Are Exhausted

You feel tired every day, partially because your work or the people in your life are draining your energy. If you can relate to this, find the thing that is draining your energy so you can cut it out of your life and move on.

5. You Feel Isolated

If you constantly feel misunderstood and alone, it is probably time to surround yourself with a new group of people. If people value you, they will try to make you feel important and they will accept you for who you are.

6. You Feel Bored

When you wake up you don’t feel excited for the day ahead. You mostly feel bored and resentful, as you think the day won’t go well.

7. You Don’t Feel Appreciated

You feel like you’re being taken for granted, as people expect things from you but they don’t thank you or congratulate you. If you have people in your life who don’t respect you, cut them out of your life so that you can find friends who will treat you well.

8. You Are Constantly Making Sacrifices

People always expect you to give up your time, energy and money, but they don’t return the favor. You experience all of the pain and anxiety, but the other person is unwilling to do the same.

9. You Make Excuses For Others

You justify the behaviour of others because you are scared of letting go and moving on. You say things like;

“He wasn’t being insensitive; he just had a tough day.”

“She has a short temper and I’m more relaxed, so I don’t mind dealing with her temper.”

10. You Repeatedly “Try To Make It Work” Even Though You Should Let Go

You tried over and over again to make the situation more bearable for you, but with little to no success. It is time to let go and move on.

Read the original article here.

Planning in 90-day Periods w/ Kendra Wright

Kendra Wright is back on the podcast to talk about why planning in 90-day periods is good for your professional and personal life. We chat about the advantages of not setting yearly goals, scheduling in time for rest and relaxation, and executing over planning.

• Why the 12-month timeline isn’t designed to move you towards action (and what you should be doing instead of setting annual goals)
• The advantages of planning in 12-week cycles and how this can help you hit your goals more consistently
• The key difference between setting goals and actually executing them
• How we romanticize getting started (and what it really looks like to show and get things done)
• Why assessing where you are at more frequently than once a year can help you stay on track
• Why it’s so important to rest and take breaks (and how this makes you more productive in the long run)
• Why you don’t have to earn your breaks (and how you can overcome feeling guilty about taking them)
• How to schedule an effective 90-day sprint while integrating rest and recovery
• How to schedule your day to integrate breaks so that you can make sure you are functioning at peak efficiency

Click here to listen to the Podcast.

7 Key Tips for Time Management

Learning proper time management is a skill. You will find there are several competent managers and leaders around you who may excel in what they do but are not the best time keepers.

If you have a habit of arriving late to work, find that you are not meeting your deadlines, or even social commitments, you might need to re-examine how you manage your time. Taking a step back to acknowledge that you may be struggling with your time management is the first step to improving yourself and how you spend your time.

Listed below are seven key tips for time management.

1. Make a List of Issues

Everyone gets distracted by one thing or another. Sometimes it’s intentional, other times it’s due to external disturbances.

You must consciously note and list all those activities that interrupt your usual flow of work. Each time you notice you have become distracted you should write it down. From there, review the list at the end of the day. In the long-term, make it an endeavor to avoid them the next day and so on.

2. Avoid Social Networking Sites

The amount of time each of us spends on social media every day is staggering. This wasted time should be effectively spent on tasks of importance (and for which we are getting paid for) at work.

If you can utilize a major proportion of time spent on social media and use it towards getting the work done, you will never be rushed to complete a task. It is best to uninstall those apps, particularly on work system or at least minimize using it. Social media can wait until break time or when you have finished your shift.

3. Set Realistic Goals & Reminders

For most of us, each day brings new challenges and new deliverables. Rather than choosing a task randomly and without a realistic timeline, you should strive to set small and large goals for your day.

You will find that setting daily goals and reminders will keep you on task, which in turn will make you more efficient. Not only that, you will find that you will become more productive and will have a sense of accomplishment as each goal is met.

For further assistance with setting goals and reminders, you can choose to use software. There is countless software available to assist you with reminders and goal setting. Just find one that suits you and your working style to ensure that you stay on track.

4. Learn How to Prioritize

It is easy to avoid doing the large or complicated tasks first, which should essentially be the center of our attention. This can be caused by getting bogged down with less important tasks. When you are overwhelmed with smaller and easier tasks, the larger, more complicated ones get pushed back.

At the end of the day, you have to do the tasks, sooner or later. So stop fooling yourself and get your priorities straight. The relief of accomplishing the larger, more complicated tasks first, will set the tone for the rest of the day.

5. Take One Thing at a Time

There are all sorts of research, reports, and analysis on multi-tasking and whether it works or not. Whatever the outcome, one thing is for sure: it is not efficient for everyone. You may be comforting yourself by noticing that you are doing it all at once and have been very busy, but the work quality of all those assignments would be compromised.

When you are multi-tasking, your mind is not focused. The concentration level and dedication is not the same when you are focused on a single piece of work compared to doing several things at once. A compromise in productivity will affect your timelines as well.

6. Understand That Free Time Is Also Money

They say time is money. If you really believe in this, then you must consider the ‘free time’ you have as valuable time too.

When I refer to free time, I do not mean time after work or during your vacations. I am referring to those ‘in between’ time periods that you have when you are visiting someone or traveling for example. You can use this downtime to quickly browse through your emails, make an urgent call, or do other.

7. Seek to Improve Yourself with Self-Help

Once you realise that you need help or must improve your time management skills, taking action is the next step. An easy way to take action is to read up on advice that is readily available online, in magazines, or newspapers.

Additionally, there are some great self-help texts in the market which will provide you with invaluable insight and solutions on how you can utilize your time, be organized, and efficient at your workplace.

Written by Samantha White.  Read the original article here.

5 Inspiring Tools for an Instant Shot of Happiness

When life’s got you down, it’s all about how quickly you can get back up. A quick video, an inspirational short story, just capturing your thoughts and how you’ll conquer them—anything can make a difference if you know what to do.

The Internet isn’t short of sites and apps that make you happy. But the trick lies in knowing about a variety of tools, and using the right one at the right time. The video that will kick you into action when you need a dose of motivation may not work to get you out of your doldrums when you’re depressed.

So here are five different resources, each offering something the others don’t. Hopefully, by using the right one at the right time, you’ll be happier and inspired.

Get Inspired 365 (Web): For When the Going Gets Tough

MakeUseOf’s Managing Editor Ryan conducted an experiment recently. He started watching three motivational videos every day, and catalogued his thoughts, emotions, and productivity. Surprisingly, he found that he was a better overall person ever since he started watching those videos.

Get Inspired 365 scours the Internet for inspirational videos, and presents at least a new one every day. A short description provides the context you need to understand why that video made the cut, and what makes it so motivational. There are also a few picture quotes, but the videos are the main attraction here. Since none of them are too long, it’s the perfect little nugget when you’re faced with a seemingly insurmountable task.

Infinite Good (Web, iOS): For Cataloguing Your Emotions, and Reading Others’

Often, you’ll read stories of great leaders and achievers, but you can’t really empathize with their struggles and goals. It’s the everyday stories of everyday people like us that really strike a chord. Infinite Good is a treasure trove of people’s experiences and emotions, and it encourages you to journal your emotions.

A collage of colors greets you, each corresponding to a type of emotion. You can browse the site or app by color, by words, or by date. Click any to read the submitter’s little experience. It can be something as small as choosing to stay in and cook dinner for the wife, instead of going out with friends.

It can even be a negative emotion, like the guilt of not helping a beggar in the rain. Even those negative emotions can spark positive change, spurring you into action the next time you come across a panhandler. The philosophy is to catalogue emotions of regular humans, to inspire other humans.

Download: Infinite Good for iOS (Free)

Zidilife (Web): For a Weekly Mantra

We know that not everyone reading this is going to actively go to a site or check out an app to get out of a funky mood. But everyone can manage to watch one video a week and live by its code. Subscribe to Zidilife’s newsletter to get a motivational video delivered to your inbox every week.

The videos are never too long, and usually have a simple message. Make that message your mantra for the week. Of course, you might need to adapt the message to suit yourself at times. For example, a video about the bond of brothers may not apply to you, but you can use it for a sibling or best friend, and make it a mantra to appreciate that person for one week.

r/UpliftingNews (Web): For Real Stories of Samaritans Across the World

There is no better example of using Reddit productively than the community at r/UpliftingNews, which seeks to break the constant negativity that the media throws in our faces. Instead, the members of this forum share good news from across the world, usually finding these links from the same media, but buried deep within their pages.

When you read their simple rule, the entire mission becomes clear: “This subreddit is meant to be a place free of excessive cynicism, negativity and bitterness. Healthy skepticism is fine under certain circumstances, but toxic attitudes are not welcome here.” It’s a happy place, meant to promote a happy attitude.

It’s perfect for a morning routine. Keep calm and cheer on.

24 Hours of Happy (Web): For That Ultimate Pick-Me-Up Song

Pop star Pharrell Williams might have written the ultimate cheerful song with Happy, but he didn’t stop there. Williams and his team filmed people from different walks of life, dancing to his song, for a full 24 hours of a day. You can read more about the Happy experiment here, but the end result is all you need to know about.

If you’re ever having a bad time, just go to 24 Hours of Happy. It will instantly pick up your local time and play the dance video from that time. It’s an incredible feeling to visit a site to be greeted by a joyous person (or persons) dancing freely, with that happy-go-lucky song playing in the background. It’s the ultimate pick-me-up.

Read the original article here.